When In Doubt - Breathe

My experience as a doula has shown me that birth is natural, normal, beautifully intricate, and a force of nature worthy of our respect. My experience as a doula has also shown me that birth plans and birth reality rarely cross paths. The preparation of a birth plan can be a useful learning and communication tool, but making a plan and handing it to your caregiver doesn’t mean that your plan will be realized.

Preparing a birth plan can help you sort out what you really want, and whether or not your desires are compatible with the practices of your chosen caregiver and birthing location. If what you want is already the standard of care, there is no need to write it in a birth plan. If what you want is NOT the standard of care, just writing it down is not sufficient. You will need to communicate with your care provider and negotiate for your desires in light of their policies, procedures, and preferences.

It is important to think about what things are most important to you, which things are not important at all, and WHY. If you know WHY something is important, then you can look for alternate opportunities to creatively integrate those important things, if necessary.

Working through a birth plan allows you to explore the pros and cons of all the options. Then, if you have to make a choice you weren’t expecting - a choice that deviates from your expectations and plans of birth - you will already know what your options are and be more prepared to make choices that are right for you.

And sometimes, no matter how carefully we plan, prepare, and negotiate for birth - - things may take an unexpected turn.

No matter what happens though…. No matter how quickly or slowly your birth unfolds…. No matter how small or large a change you have to make in your expectations and hopes for your desired birth experience…. Whatever happens…. When in doubt…. You can breathe.

You can choose to relax your body, and you can choose to breathe in a way that nourishes and sustains you and your baby. You can find a rhythm and a ritual that are meaningful and helpful to you in the moment. Your breath is literally the breath of life to your child, and it is a gift you can continue to give your baby, no matter how your birth experience unfolds.

Your rhythm, your ritual, your ability to relax, and your very breath, can carry you through.